From the very first post of Mother of the WHAT?! I said I would be authentic, in fact, the subtitle of this blog is True Tales of an Ordinary Mom. I’m here today to share the truth about something that has been a hard, but real part of our lives as parents. Last week we enrolled our youngest in a program – away from us – where we believe he will get some additional help and guidance, some healing and direction, and some hope for his future.
I am sharing this for three reasons:
1) I write here for others and in that writing, I share the truth – which is sometimes good, touching, funny, embarrassing, boring but sometimes hard, and sometimes – it leaves me vulnerable.
2) Our child will likely be in this program for a year, I’m not going to pretend in my writing that he is here during this time when he is not.
3) I am sharing because a decision like this doesn’t happen for most parents, but when it does, it feels heavy, and you feel alone, and sometimes a little defensive of your decision. It also might feel embarrassing or even humiliating, but I don’t believe it has to feel this way. So, if you are in a situation like this, or know of someone who is, let’s lift the veil and talk about it.
This wasn’t a decision we made lightly, I can’t imagine that anyone enters into a decision like this easily. There are some that will (and have) questioned our decision, and there will likely be some who talk behind our backs, but we invite those discussions or questions to come to us; we are confident in our decision, we are fighting for the heart of our child, and we are not ashamed of that.
Its been difficult for a very long time. As he gets older, the consequences for some of his choices are beginning to fall outside of our parenting. His past has tweaked the way he thinks and reacts, and we needed to get him more help than we are equipped to give him. But maybe, just maybe, we have been equipped…to release him…for this period.
This week I have cried, felt relief, had peace, cried some more, felt light, felt heavy, and been confident. But most of all, I have trusted in the Lord, that he who began a good work in this boy will continue to work to bring it to completion…
I am encouraged by this season. It will look different, it will feel different, and I have a belief that ultimately it will be refreshing and beautiful for each of us.
I wrote over at Moms.FortWayne.com about this as well…you can read that here.