You are amazing. Really. This note feels personal to me, because I know so many of you. When I talk with my sister-in-law, Kalie, I am sometimes reminded of the challenges she faces as she manages to get three young kids out of the house on time everyday ~ even if that means beginning to pull out of driveway to get that last straggler (oh, Jared!) moving….quickly!
You have to figure out how to work all day, plan dinner, prepare dinner, clean up dinner, oversee homework, get groceries, get your kids to practices and games, look them in the eye, engage them in activities, be intentional, and more! All of this in a shorter time span than those who are stay at home moms. And…for those of you with school age kids, I was reminded by a conversation with my friend Gina that when summer arrives there are all those hours that they were in school to figure out as well. Seriously, you have a lot on your plate.
The mommy debates on stay at home versus working mom are unfortunate. I don’t think my staying at home makes me a better mom than the mom who goes to work. In fact I know several moms who have confessed that working makes them better moms. When they say better they aren’t comparing themselves to other moms, I believe they are comparing themselves to themselves. “If I stayed home all day, I would go crazy.” Or “If I worked full time, I would lose my mind.”
When Kalie had a baby she and her sister-in-law decided to open a business together; a daycare center. They acquired the land, had plans drawn, watched the building go up, created jobs in her small town, hired staff for those jobs. They did this so that they could be with their kids and have some income. They wanted to create a safe environment for other moms who worked. I was a stay at home mom, she became a working mom. I was so proud of her. No wars, no comparison.
My sister Tracey works full time, with special needs kids, she is amazing with these kids. Loving and challenging. She believes in them and sees in them what many others do not. I am so glad she made the commitment to work, there are kids whose worlds are literally a little bit better because of her decision. My sister Jamie has incredible energy and brilliance in marketing. I love that she has the outlet of her career, and I am humbled constantly by how she shares her resources.
So, dear working mom, if you are feeling stretched and challenged, if you sometimes find yourself tripping over guilt and laundry baskets, be encouraged. Take a deep breath and remind yourself of ALL you do – know you are a superstar!
Enjoy your l-o-n-g Memorial Day weekend!
(You can read A note to Stay at Home Moms here.)