Kevin and I received a PowerPoint presentation the other night from Courtney. She is planning her second year of college and wants to move to a new dorm…which will add to the college bill. While she is responsible for a portion of her tuition, we pay the balance, so adding to the bill without a discussion would certainly lead to a discussion!
She texted us to ask that we jump on Skype. Once we were all on, she pulled up a PowerPoint and walked us through each slide. I have shared previously about the process of presenting requests, (see link below) and once again I was made aware of why I think this process is valuable.
- Articulating what you want is a foundational skill to have ~ in a family, friendship, marriage or the work environment. Her presentations have always begun with what she is trying to achieve and why.
- Presenting an understanding of what it will take to achieve your desired outcome is also an important skill to have. This helps you create a plan for yourself, and if it involves others, it shows an understanding of the cost or consequence to them. It has meant a lot to us that she has been able to see beyond what she wants and consider our perspective.
- Putting together a written plan for achieving your outcome is an invaluable skill. It is what will propel you forward. Her plans reveal that she doesn’t feel entitled to the outcome for which she is hoping.
- Concluding and waiting for a response is also valuable. Although our culture is an instant, I want it now, I don’t have to wait culture…giving time and space for processing allows for a more thoughtful response.
I am sharing this here because as parents, it is our greatest honor and responsibility to guide our children into being responsible, mature adults. Personally, I sense much of the younger culture feels more entitled, less responsible, more independent but less able to stand securely on their own. I believe our process is a tool we use to fight that.
I also believe this process creates a broader view and understanding of desires and helps our children become responsible for moving themselves towards their goals…whether that is getting a pet, going on a trip with friends, or moving to a new, more costly dorm. As our oldest, Courtney has been leading the way in the area of presenting requests and she has blazed the trail in a manner worthy of following.
So Erin, I know you are waiting for this summer (the summer before high school) to get a Facebook page, but instead of just getting one, I believe you will have to gather your thoughts and present your request.
P. S.You’re welcome.
Click here to read “Present Your Request”