These Ordinary Days are Slipping Away

posted in family, life, marriage on by with 5 Replies

I haven’t been very faithful to write here this month. I haven’t exactly known how to tell what’s been going on and so I don’t write anything, then I’m not sure where to begin.

We’ve known for a few years that Kevin’s job would be coming to an end. His company decided to move all the operations that took place in this city to another city, and we chose not to accept the invitation to move our life to that city. So we knew this time would come.

I’m so proud of my husband, during the last two years he has met with many who were either losing their jobs, choosing to retire or choosing to move their families 180 miles away. He focused on them and never worried about what he would do; he simply felt called to stay put until the transition was made for the employees. Well, now that process is about done and so it became time to focus on us and our next steps.

Kevin was pursued by another company for a great portion of these last few years but he let them know he needed to finish well here. He took their calls, had some dinners, went to some meetings, but kept his focus on the job at hand, which was to close down operations here. We prayed and felt peace all the way through this process.

Then his end date was set for his job, and as his job came to a close this other company came in with just the right offer at just the right time. Though this company is not 180 miles away, it is 90 miles away and so a move is inevitable.

With a daughter in college, a son starting college (who will be living at home – at least his first year) and a daughter about to begin her junior year in high school, we decided that the kids and I would stay here in this house so Erin could finish her last two years of high school without moving. When Erin leaves for college, I will leave to join Kevin.

During these two years Kevin will live 90 miles away during the week, we will live here and we will figure out how to bridge the distance during this period. (Hello Facetime, mid-week rendezvouses and learning how to unclog a drain for myself!) In some ways, this plan has made the idea of the transition a little easier for me…I’ve been able to just be excited for my husband and this incredible career opportunity – without crying about having to leave the community we love so much. (Seriously, this makes my heart sink a little as I write that, but I don’t linger there, we have two years to live in the embrace of our friendships and church.)

In the meantime, Kevin has been on what we have been calling a sabbatical (Sabbatical or a sabbatical (from Latin sabbaticus, from Greek sabbatikos, from Hebrew shabbat, i.e., Sabbath, literally a “ceasing”) is a rest from work, or a break). He has been home every day for 17 days so far! These wonderful days all feel like weekend days, neither of us can ever seem to ever remember what day it really is.“Why is Jay Leno on in the Saturday Night Live time slot?” I wonder each night!

I am loving these days. These days are our break, our rest, our time to connect, to strengthen our marriage, our communication and our family. But they are slipping away.

In 12 days Kevin will begin his new career – 90 miles away. So we are buying a house – 90 miles away. He will live there during the week, but he will come home on weekends and sometimes we will go there on weekends. Sometimes he will come home mid-week, and sometimes Erin and I will run up there mid-week. We will have to figure out our new ordinary.

There you have it, the beginning of our next chapter. I don’t know how the story will go, but I know it will be a good one. Stay tuned….

Here we are sitting on the steps of what will soon be our “other home”.

 I mentioned 3 of our 4 children in this post, our 4th is still in the program that he entered last fall. We are going to be visiting him in just a few days. (!!) I wrote Leaving to Hold On over here.

(If you’ve managed a transition like this, please feel invited to comment and let us know what worked, what didn’t, what challenged you and how you grew!)

5 Comments on “These Ordinary Days are Slipping Away

  • Hi Sheri, Wow! Sounds like quite the opportunity. Chris and I have managed this to a lesser extent over the past 3 years as my current work has me traveling to Boston, MA 2 or 3 weeks a month and makes it challenging. Thus, mid-week excurisions can’t happen! Routine is important for us as both boys are headed to high school this year. I have weekly meetings with each of them 1:1 during the school year to ‘check-in’ and that has worked really well. We tried skype for homework and that not so much. We are an iPhone family, but we rarely do facechat simply because of schedules. So, that is one work and 2 doesn’t work (works, doesn’t work). Happy to share more. Good luck to both of you on this ‘next chapter’. John P.S. – Is Kevin really wearing capri pants in this picture?? Really, Kevin???

  • Sheri and Kevin…Kerry and I have done the work commute from city to city more than once. We managed to make it work each time. Mid week get togethers were great when schedules allowed. Kerry drove home for a few hockey games of Kyle’s midweek. It meant an early trip back to WLaf but a Starbucks in hand and Serious XM helped. We had nightly phone calls; we cheered for Purdue together, watched the same TV shows, discussed books, scripture, successes, challenges, all by phone. Secret notes were packed into suitcases or left on pillows. The one thing that made each absence bearable was total trust in God, to see us through transition and change. ……You will do it all so well!

  • Thanks Karen and John for taking time to leave encouraging words for us! We are in the beginning stages of trying some things.

    Our update: Today we closed on the house in Marshall and we are pretty excited about having a home there. We put some dishes and food in the cupboards, some family pictures on the living room book shelf and are now on the lookout for some furniture. We feel a real peace about this and I believe when the time comes for me to move there full time it will be a wonderful life in this quaint little town. Our home is right off of downtown, so we will walk everywhere. It’ll be good.

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